there was a trapeze. enough said
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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