ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
