No awkward lesbian experiences without me
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
