It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
