I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
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