I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
