I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
