I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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