so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
