Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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