Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Define "chronic" masturbator.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
