Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
