do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
You're like the curious george of whores
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
