I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize