Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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