i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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