doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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