i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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