i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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