Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
