Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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