Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
