C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
