Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
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