you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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