they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Found the puke drawer
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize