Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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