you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
