Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Randomize
