Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
