Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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