Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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