You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
