In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
