i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
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