I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize