toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
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