I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
