Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
is wine microwaveable?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Randomize
