Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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