Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
