she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
