Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
