covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
