The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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