I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
