i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
