Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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