she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
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