whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
