Ambien. No doubt about it.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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